leicesters | IC INBOX: KENOS

Byleth, Dimitri and I are from three different Fódlans, where events diverged pretty dramatically. As Dimitri would have it, Byleth picked the Blue Lion house as its teacher. The way I remember it, of course he couldn't say no to teaching his adorable little Golden Deer. --That was my house, back in the day.

[Which probably explains all his oblique animal metaphors he likes to make sometimes... but anyway.]

And for the Byleth we know here? He never became a teacher, but eventually joined Dimitri's army as a sellsword. I was basically a stranger to him.

[Which was tough, at least at first, but he's long since come to terms with it.]

[Three different ones.

In her time here Hayame has heard of people who came from the same world but different “points in time” from one another, or from worlds that sounded similar in culture or geography but differed elsewhere, but. This was the first time she’d heard of three branching… “timelines”. A concept she wrestled to get her head around on a good day, mind, but.]

I assume you all figured that out quite early, at least?

[Another kebab, gone.]

You two do not seem strangers now.

[… And though it was decidedly not her business…]

Byleth speaks highly of you, at least.

[Chewing thoughtfully on the bread, Claude nods and swallows.]

Yeah. Though, I think it freaked him out at first that I knew everything about him, and he didn't know anything about me. Then, as we got to know each other, he started to worry that I was trying to use him as a substitute for the Byleth I'd lost. He might still think that...

[He's not sure. It had been addressed under the tree by Sothis, but did he listen then? Did Sothis relay what had been said, if not?]

It's a little complicated. It's sort of like meeting a twin brother who was separated a few years back. They're very similar people, but there are just so many differences in experiences by now, it'd be impossible for me to mistake them as the same person.

That sounds reasonable enough.

[To be… freaked out. She certainly would be if someone she’d never met claimed to know that much about her, and was perhaps able to actually back some of it up. Confusing, too, but… the twin analogy helps.

She may have taken the liberty to repeat that Byleth had praised and defended Claude to her, but the doubts about their friendship… well that was more personal. That was for them alone.]

He is still of your world, I suppose. Even if he is not the man you knew.

[That must be comforting, she thinks. Not being the lone survivor.]

He is a straightforward man.

[Said in a way that was admittedly hard to tell if it was a compliment or not, but.]

He is, isn't he? [Claude grins, and in his case, the reaction is unmistakably fond.] He says everything like it is.

[Much like a certain other person he knows. It's refreshing, for someone steeped in a lifetime of being slippery and hard to decipher.]

Like Teach, though, he finds it difficult to show emotion at times. Teach got a lot more expressive over time, but... This Byleth is still getting used to interacting with people beyond merc jobs.

[Maybe that's why Claude never found Hayame daunting to deal with. She might worry that she never smiled, but Byleth simply didn't emote much at all, even to show negative emotion like anger. He understands well that it doesn't mean they feel any less than anyone else, just for a lack of showing it.]

He did say that.

[Which she feels is what made that man more straightforward than she was, for she would speak her mind... but she rarely felt the need to explain herself, or what about her past might lead her to think or say what she did. In her own world, people had known things about her just by looking at her race, her sex, the style of her hair, the fact that she had arms. Here... she was allowed certain privacies. And she guarded them fiercely.]

Perhaps, then, he simply needs that same amount of time.

[He had said to her that he missed having someone to take orders from... and she missed the same. There were orders that could be taken here... but could those giving them be trusted? That was a different issue.

Her lips turn down at the thought, annoyed that she cannot stop herself from thinking in order to just... eat.

... The fruit with the meat was a nice combination, though. She helps herself to more of that.]

Yeah, I think so. He needs to figure out his own path, and where he fits into all this.

[And while Claude could tell him what to do as much as Jeralt used to, he wouldn't feel comfortable about it. He piles a few more vegetables onto his plate and leaves it at that, taking a pause to eat. Thinking it over, he does note that Byleth seems to be one of the rare few Hayame has at least a neutral, not negative, opinion of.]

Anyway, that's how Byleth fits into things with me. If you have questions, I can answer whatever you like...? [He could talk at her about anything and everything all day, but maybe she's curious about certain things, too.]

[What Claude says is true enough. There is only so much another person can do to lead, when the root cause of something was in another. Not if you actually valued the other person, anyway, and allowing them the freedom to become their own being. ... Not that she actually knew much about that part.

Hayame chews instead of asking questions. Her tail swishes anxiously across the floor, the motion interrupted by the cushions. The longer this goes on... The more obvious it must be how unsuitable she is as a partner for such things as this. Normal things. She had dined with Amos Burton before, but Amos Burton was a very silent man. She'd had tea with Liem Talbott, but that had been brief, and what to speak about had been decided. So what is she supposed to do? She could just demand he come up with a topic, or ask a vague question to set him on a path, but.

It feels like a cop out. Cowardly, as she's ever proving in this realm. The silence stretches on, broken only by the soft clink of silverware and her chewing until suddenly she manages,]

- I have a half-brother.

[... A very smooth segueway.

- What? He'd said he had them. It's... something in common. Even if she knows the circumstances must be vastly different between the way a prince has numerous siblings and a breeding stable jinba does.]

[Claude lets the quiet stretch on as he polishes off his steak, washing it down with more wine. He can hold his alcohol, but it and the food are both making him feel pleasantly fuzzy, so he doesn't feel the need to rush Hayame. Even in silence, he enjoys her company.]

Huh. [He had no idea what she'd ask, or say, but it wasn't that.] I didn't expect we'd have that in common... What's he like?

[Proud and cold, like Hayame? Competitive like his own brothers? He hoped, at least, that he wasn't cruel to her as Shahid was to him. Not having a throne to compete over had to help, but jinba were surely under all kinds of other pressures that would strain a sibling relationship.]

[As much as she sometimes wished for it, there was no comfort for her to be found in drink- no pleasant haziness or soft blur. She was a little jealous of humans for that, sometimes.]

I have many half-siblings, actually. But only Yubari and I look passable as brother and sister.

[They both were spitting images of their dam, and so each other. They were closest in age, just one foaling season apart. Birthed when the broodmare forced to bear them was younger, before she started losing them more frequently before finally succumbing to one that wouldn’t come out. But she doesn’t know anything about that Armless woman beyond what she looked like from a distance, and how she sounded when sent off to stud. Yubari, though-]

… He is the only one I trusted. And the only one who believed in me- that a mare could become a warlord’s horse.

[Something to have in common… her gaze grows distant, her fingers rub absently along the stem of her wine glass. What was he like… ? Even that, she would have known better if she herself were less cold, and more kind… if she had let him call her “sister” in public…]

He was not as good a shot as I am, but he was a fine archer. A better craftsman- he made my arrows. He was loyal… more understanding. … Kinder.

[(If she went back… if she survived by some miracle… Perhaps she could apologize-)]

[It's perhaps the first time he's heard an admission from her, even indirectly, that she values things like understanding and kindness, to mention them as positive traits in her brother. He smiles, bittersweet though it is.]

It sounds to me like he admired you. [Even if it riles him to realise her best goal had been to be someone's horse, once.] Honestly, I'd like to meet him someday.

[When all this is over, and her world is restored. It still might sound like a fanciful idea now, but it's one he's determined to cling to.]

It's for the best that he isn't caught up in all this here, though.

[If pressed, she would deny that she valued those things. They were just traits, that's all, easy ways to compare her with Yubari. Weaknesses that men were allowed to have, and women were not.

But.]

To his misfortune, yes.

[He had admired her. He was the only one who had, who hadn't been scared off by her demeanor and her iron, who was willing to help her prove herself as a warrior despite how she treated him, and it had nearly gotten him killed... and now risked being labeled a traitor's brother. She almost says that Claude surely wouldn't be able to meet him, that if Zenith were right it wasn't for the best at all, he was gone with her world, but-

She refuses to believe that.

Her lips purse again in thought, lapsing into silence before her fingers leave her glass to find the gold chain around her neck, the one that disappeared into the tight bindings around her breasts.]

- Do you wish to see?

Can I? I'd love to. [Claude's eyes light up, and he's already getting to his feet; it would be far too awkward to lean across the table, so he moves to Hayame's side instead to better see the sunbeam.]

It can be a nice little introduction to what I'll see in person, eventually.

[An idea he's not going to let drop in a hurry, whether it's a reasonable one or not.]

[At the party Liem Talbott had organized in Alenroux, when Claude had stumbled upon her in the makeshift privacy of one of the tents, she had hidden her bead from him. From everyone, not just him. But now she has offered, and he has accepted, come over to her, and so... she pulls the iliachtida from her tight breast bindings and cups the bead part in her hand.

Her lips purse, again, over his assertion that he will see it for himself... But she doesn't tell him he won't. She just thinks it.

Slowly, an image coalesces in the bead's surface. A military camp, mostly human, setting up for the night, and amongst their number is a male centaur with an unmistakable similarity in looks to Hayame- the same mane, the same sort of face, the same dun coat. He sees to his duties, unpacking and preparing supplies...]

That is Yubari.

[Where she'd sent him, back to their master to tell him the location of the hidden village where she'd been taken prisoner... now back to take the village by storm. On this day, the day that repeats itself over and over in her bead... He probably didn't even know if she was still alive.

Her expression is... sad. Despite herself.]

[He watches as the image takes shape, and the jinba's resemblance to Hayame is striking, even if she hadn't said a word to explain who he is. Claude watches 'Yubari' assemble supplies, he wonders how many times Hayame has watched this scene play out, just how often she'd been alone with that sad expression and the iliachtida in her hand.

More often than she'd ever admit, he supposes, given how she had reacted back in Alenroux. What would she say to him, if she ever saw her brother again in person? Maybe she'd simply struggle to find the words, as she often does.

His hand finds her shoulder, and he squeezes gently, now more sober than before.]

You'll see him again.

[She would get there, and things will be different, and they'll be reunited. They have to believe that it's possible.]

[Claude’s wonderings were probably right. Hayame has watched this scene, and the other scenes that the sunbeam bead deigned to show her, countless nights since she had been given it by the Tribune. At first, she told herself she was looking for signs of falsehood in it, just trying to make sure that she wasn’t being deceived, that it was something she could trust in… but she’d eventually had to admit that it wasn’t that. That she was just lonely, the only jinba in a strange world when there were so many others who deserved to survive and would fight better for her world and its people than she could. That she felt if she didn’t look and remind herself of what home was supposed to look like and be like that she would go mad amidst the strange sights and experiences of Kenos.

But it had always been alone. She’s never shown anyone else what was inside. Even just the brief scene feels too exposed, too raw, like she’d ripped open her breast to show off her auxiliary heart. So after just a beat more, just long enough to watch Yubari set a crate down and look off towards the mountain with a worried expression on his face…

Hayame withdraws Meridian’s energy from the bead and cuts the vision. Her fingers curl around it and then banish it back to the tight confines of her breast bindings, and-]

Your food will grow cold.

[She says that, but. Her head has turned slightly, inward and to the side, just enough so that her cheek could rest against his knuckles where his hand rested on her shoulder.]

That's what you're worried about? [He teases, but his voice is gentle, leaning in to press a kiss to her hair. He knows it's not food that's on her mind, not really. That the worry on her brother's face for her was surely a reflection of her own feelings.]

We'll make it in time, and both your brother and the village will be safe. I'll do everything I can to make that happen.

[It sounded like bluster, but he had once saved an entire continent from destruction. Why couldn't he somehow find a way to save all the people Hayame cared for, too? They had to try.]

[He always sounds so blissfully confident and sure when he says those things, and Hayame thinks that a lesser woman (a more trusting woman, a softer woman) would be tempted just to believe him because of that. She can't, though. She almost regrets it, but she can't. Not that easily.

... But he had promised to be on her side, and so she cannot blame him for being there, either. Still, what is she supposed to say to those foolhardy, heroic lines? The kiss he presses to her hair is more the type of comfort she preferred, silent and subtle, (not- not that she preferred kissing!), not requiring an answer from her, but the rest...

Her hand moves, perhaps to cup his cheek or pull him closer... but instead her fingertips pinch his lips closed.]

[His heart skips a beat when her hand reaches for him, as it always does whenever she reciprocates affection from him... only for his mouth to be pinched shut.

Oh.

He lets go of her shoulder and makes an exaggerated face of surprise, along with a muffled noise that might be an indignant 'hey!'. She's supposed to love his corny lines??? (no)]

[She has very powerful fingers, and even though he moves, she doesn't actually release his lips.

The problem is, she hadn't actually thought through what she was to do after she shut him up. (The good thing is... she seems to be increasingly distracted from her sadness.) Her own lips purse in frustration, a hint of color rising on her skin, trying to make sure she doesn't pinch too hard.]

... Are you going to eat your food now?

[Blinking or nodding would do...]

[He blinks, and, unless he wants a bruised mouth for decidedly unattractive reasons, he should probably listen, so he gives an 'uh huh' noise and a comical little nod.

(If his antics cheer Hayame up even a little, then... bonus?)]

[...]

Very well.

[Carefully, she removes the pinch from his lips, slowly pulling her hand back as if daring him to say more. And, to be a good role model... she moves to resume eating herself, intent on polishing off a good deal more of the food on the table.

She wasn't kidding about the two stomachs.]

[Claude is giving her the full pathetic kicked puppy eyes as she removes her hand, and sits back down in his seat, looking appropriately chastised. Then he resumes eating, to try to conquer the last plateful he can manage. He's starting to feel pretty full anyway, but at least Hayame can finish off the things he doesn't. Maybe next time he'll offer even more food, seeing her appetite for himself.

He does keep giving not-so-subtle glances to her in the meantime, though. Or clearing this throat. Is he allowed to talk yet? Does she have anything else to talk about, or would she prefer the silence persisted?]

[Those puppy dog eyes won't work on her! She doesn't stop him from talking again now that she's released him (as long as he doesn't bring up foolhardy heroic lines about making it back to her world, anyway), but she herself does focus more on eating... Until she's decimated a lot of what he provided. But considering her size, maybe it wasn't so shocking.

When she finishes, though, she folds her napkin and bows her head.]

Thank you for the meal.

[She is... not aware of the courtesy. Should she offer to... clean? To wash dishes? There is an awkward moment where it might be obvious that she doesn't know what to do... until she stands, adjusting her clothing and... looking as if she's about to... leave?]

- I shall return in about an hour.

[Claude looks disappointed that she's seemingly getting up to leave on such an awkward note. He hadn't expected her to clean -- this was his treat for her, so of course he wanted to treat her like a guest -- but it seems she hadn't intended to linger anyway.]

Oh, okay? I'll see you then. Did you forget to take care of something?

[He's not really expecting an explanation, though, getting to his feet to start collecting empty plates.]

Edited (missed a word) 2023-06-26 10:33 (UTC)

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